Math Jokes:
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

Math Genius

This is a story of a Math Genius:

One Day a person came to this Math Genius, thinking that he is too smart and want to challenge this Mth Genius asking a tough question to embarrass him in front of a big crowd.

He asked, "Can you tell me a number, that if we divide it by any number from 1-10 the answer will always come in the form of a whole number and not as a fraction." Math Genius looked back at him and said, "Take the number of months in a year, multiply it with number of days in a month (30), and multiply that with the number of days in a week and you will have your answer." The person checked the answer and found it was correct. The number was 12 x 30 x 7 = 2520.

A person was about to die, and before dying he wrote his Will, "I have 17 Camels, and I have three sons. Divide my Camels in such a way, that My eldest son gets half of them, the second one gets 1/3rd of the total and my youngest son gets 1/9th of the total number of Camels."

After his death when the relatives read his will they got extremely perplexed and said to each other that how can we divide 17 camels like this.

So after a long hard thought they decided that there was only one Math Genius who could answer such a question. So they all came to him and put forward their problem.

Math Genius said, "Ok. I will divide the camels as per the man's will; I will lend one of my camels to the total which makes it 18; now lets divide as per his will."
The Eldest gets 1/2 of 18 = 9
The second one gets 1/3 of 18 = 6
and The Youngest gets 1/9 of 18 = 2
That distributes 17 camels. Then this Math Genius said, "Now I will take my Camel back."

Why was the Math book unhappy?     It had too many problems !
How do you make seven an even number?     Take the s out !
Why is 6 afraid of 7?     Because 7 8 9 ! Seven ate nine !
What do you get if you add two apples and three apples?     A middle school math problem!
What did one Math book say to the other?    Don't bother me I've got my own problems!
If you got $10 from 10 people, what would you have?     A new bike !
What did the circle say to the tangent line?     Stop touching me..... :
Why do the cricket players take cigarette lighters ????????????   BECAUSE THEY LOST ALL THE MATCHES. (Qasim Raza Merchant)
How do you make a foolish person busy all day????    PUT HIM IN A ROUND ROOM AND TELL HIM TO SIT IN A CORNER.(Qasim Raza Merchant)
A guy had a parrot named Polly. The parrot died. A mathematician asked the guy, "How did the parrot die?" The guy replied, "Polly no meal, Polly gone."
The mathematician was puzzled in his mind, thinking "Polynomial Polygon." ......"Polynomial Polygon." ......"Polynomial Polygon."
A mathematician wandered home at 3 AM. His wife became very upset, telling him, "You're late! You said you'd be home by 11:45!" The mathematician replied, "I'm right on time. I said I'd be home by a quarter of twelve."
Teacher: How much is half of 8
Pupil: Up and down or across ?
Teacher: What do you mean ?
Pupil: Well,up and down makes it 3, but across the middle makes it 0.
Teacher: Can you count to 10?
Pupil: Yes, teacher-one, two, three, four, five, six, seven...
Teacher: Stop! Teacher points to another pupil - Now go on from there.
Pupil: Eight, nine, ten, Jack, Queen, King.
Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?
Pupil: One dollar.
Teacher: You don't know your arithmetic.
Pupil: You don't know my father !
If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left ?
I don't know.
Why not ?
In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.
OK, If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have ?
Big hands !
This poem was written by Jon Saxton (an author of math textbooks).

((12 + 144 + 20 + (3 * 4^(1/2))) / 7) + (5 * 11) = 9^2 + 0

Or for those who have trouble reading the poem:

A Dozen, a Gross and a Score,
plus three times the square root of four,
divided by seven, plus five times eleven,
equals nine squared and not a bit more.

Three men were in the hospital waiting room when the nurse rushed in and said to the first man, "Sir, you're the father of twins."

"Hey! Isn't that a coincidence!" he replied. "I'm a member of the Minnesota Twins baseball team."

Later, the nurse came in and said to the second man, "Sir, you're the father of triplets."

"Gee!" the man exclaimed. "Another coincidence! I'm with the 3M Company."

The third man jumped to his feet, grabbed his hat and said, "I'm getting out of here. I work for 7-UP!" (Submitted by Afshan Hussaini)

A girl holding a baby walks into a drug store and asks the clerk if she can use the store's baby scale.

"Sorry, ma'am," says the clerk. "Our baby scale is broken. But we can figure the baby's weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adult scale, and then weigh the mother alone, and subtract the second number from the first."

"Oh, that won't work," says the girl.

"Why not?" asks the clerk.

"Because," she answers, "I'm not the mother - I'm the aunt." (Submitted by Faisel Saeed)

Australians conducted a scientific, mathematical, statistical worldwide survey with the following question:

"Please give us your opinion on the lack of food in the rest of the world"

No response was received. I suppose, the following problems were faced during the survey's implementation :

1. In Eastern Europe and most of Asia no one knew what is "opinion".
2. In Western Europe no one knew what is "lack".
3. In Africa no one knew what is "food".
4. In North America no one knew what is "rest of the world".
5. In South America no one knew what is "Please".

The English Language: Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?. Let's face it. English is a crazy language. There is no egg in the eggplant, no ham in the hamburger, and neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England. French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted, but if we examine its paradoxes we find that Quicksand takes you down slowly, Boxing rings are square. And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing. If the plural of tooth is teeth. Shouldn't the plural of booth be beeth, If the teacher taught, Why didn't the preacher praught. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Why do people recite at a play, yet play at a recital; Park on driveways and Drive on parkways?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn up as it burns down; And in which you fill in a form by filling it out. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (Which of course isn't a race at all).

A man left the cold snowy streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.

Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before.

When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

Your Loving Husband.

PS: Sure is hot down here. (Submitted by Munir Din)

Some time ago I received a call from a colleague, who asked if I would be the referee on the grading of an examination question. He was about to give a student a zero for his answer to a physics question, while the student claimed he should receive a perfect score and would if the system were not set up against the student. The instructor and the student agreed to an impartial arbiter, and I was selected. I went to my colleague's office and read the examination question:

"Show how it is possible to determine the height of a tall building with the aid of a barometer."

The student had answered: "Take the barometer to the top of the building, attach a long rope to it, lower it to the street, and then bring it up, measuring the length of the rope. The length of the rope is the height of the building."

I pointed out that the student really had a strong case for full credit since he had really answered the question completely and correctly. On the other hand, if full credit were given, it could well contribute to a high grade in his physics course. A high grade is supposed to certify competence in physics, but the answer did not confirm this. I suggested that the student have another try at answering the question. I was not surprised that my colleague agreed, but I was surprised when the student did. I gave the student six minutes to answer the question with the warning that the answer should show some knowledge of physics. At the end of five minutes, he had not written anything. I asked if he wished to give up, but he said no. He had many answers to this problem; he was just thinking of the best one. I excused myself for interrupting him and asked him to please go on.

In the next minute, he dashed off his answer which read:

"Take the barometer to the top of the building and lean over the edge of the roof. Drop the barometer, timing its fall with a stopwatch. Then, using the formula S=0.5*a*t^2, calculate the height of the building."

At this point, I asked my colleague if he would give up. He conceded, and gave the student almost full credit. In leaving my colleague's office, I recalled that the student had said that he had other answers to the problem, so I asked him what they were. "Oh, yes," said the student.

"There are many ways of getting the height of a tall building with the aid of a barometer. For example, you could take the barometer out on a sunny day and measure the height of the barometer, the length of its shadow, and the length of the shadow of the building, and by the use of simple proportion, determine the height of the building."

"Fine," I said, "and others?"

"Yes," said the student. "There is a very basic measurement method you will like. In this method, you take the barometer and begin to walk up the stairs. As you climb the stairs, you mark off the length of the barometer along the wall. You then count the number of marks, and this will give you the height of the building in barometer units. "A very direct method."

"Of course, if you want a more sophisticated method, you can tie the barometer to the end of a string, swing it as a pendulum, and determine the value of g at the street level and at the top of the building. From the difference between the two values of g, the height of the building, in principle, can be calculated."

"Finally," he concluded, "there are many other ways of solving the problem. Probably the best," he said, "is to take the barometer to the basement and knock on the superintendent's door. When the superintendent answers, you speak to him as follows: 'Mr. Superintendent, here is a fine barometer. If you will tell me the height of the building, I will give you this barometer."

At this point, I asked the student if he really did not know the conventional answer to this question. He admitted that he did, but said that he was fed up with high school and college instructors trying to teach him how to think, to use the "scientific method," and to explore the deep inner logic of the subject in a pedantic way, as is often done in the new mathematics, rather than teaching him the structure of the subject. With this in mind, he decided to revive scholasticism as an academic lark to challenge the Sputnik-panicked classrooms of America.

There are three engineers in a car; an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong.

The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics of the car and trying to trace where a fault might have occurred. The chemical engineer, not knowing much about cars, suggests that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified and getting blocked somewhere.

Then, the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about anything, comes up with a suggestion, "Why don't we close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and maybe it'll work !?" (Zareen Shaukat)

Actual dialog of a former Microsoft "Word" Customer Support employee:
Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?
Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Microsoft "Word".
What sort of trouble?
Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
Went away?
They disappeared.
Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.
Are you still in Microsoft "Word", or did you get out?
How do I tell?
Can you see the C:\prompt on the screen?
What's a sea-prompt?
Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?
There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
Does your monitor have a power indicator?
What's a monitor?
It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
I don't know.
Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it.
Can you see that?
Yes, I think so.
Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Yes, it is.
When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
Okay, here it is.
Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely in to the back of your computer.
I can't reach.
Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
Can you see if you put your knee on something and lean way over?
Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
Well, turn on the office light then.
I can't.
No? Why not?
Because there's a power outage.
A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?
Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it.
Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
Really? Is it that bad?
Yes, I'm afraid it is.
Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer.
A student wrote letter to his home:

Dear Dad!
This $chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. Mathematic$, a$tronomy, and economic$ are the $ubject$ I like. With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a po$t card, a$ I would love to $ee $ome word$ from you.

$end it to me $oon,
Your $on

A week later he received a letter from home:

Dear Son!
I kNOw that trigoNOmetry, astroNOmy, and ecoNOmics are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and kNOw that NO one can ever learn eNOugh.

Your NOt so kNOwledgeable Dad

A lazy dog is a slow pup.
A slope-up is an inclined plane.
An ink-lined plane is a sheet of writing-paper.
Therefore, a lazy dog is a sheet of writing-paper.
A team of engineers were required to measure the height of a flag pole. They only had a measuring tape, and were getting quite frustrated trying to keep the tape along the pole. It kept falling down, etc.

A mathematician comes along, finds out their problem, and proceeds to remove the pole from the ground and measure it easily. When he leaves, one engineer says to the other: "Just like a mathematician! We need to know the height, and he gives us the length!"

The British gutter press has decided to encode its royal family stories discretely in Morse code. I suppose their headlines now read:

Did Di die... Di did die.... Di Died.
Did Dodi die... Dodi did die.... Dodi died.
Did Di Dodi die... Di Dodi did die.... Di Dodi died!! Di...Di...Di Died!

What is "pi"?

Mathematician:     Pi is the ratio of circumference of a circle to its diameter.

Engineer:     Pi is about 22/7.

Computer Programmer:     Pi is 3.141592653589 in double precision.

Nutritionist:     You one track math-minded fellows, Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!

A statistician can have his head in an oven and his feet in ice, and he will say that on the average he feels fine.
The guy gets on a bus and starts threatening everybody: "I'll integrate you! I'll differentiate you!!!" So everybody gets scared and runs away. Only one person stays. The guy comes up to him and says: "Aren't you scared, I'll integrate you, I'll differentiate you!!!" And the other guy says; "No, it won't do anything to me, I am e^x".
Three economists and three mathematicians were going for a trip by train. Before journey mathematicians bought 3 tickets and economists bought only one. Mathematicians were glad their stupid colleagues were going to pay a fine. However, when the conductor was approaching their compartment, all three economists went to the nearest toilet.

Conductor noticing that somebody is in the toilet knocked to the door and in reply saw a hand with the ticket. He checked it and economists saved 2/3 of the ticket price. Next day mathematicians decided to use the same strategy - they bought only one ticket, but economists did not buy ticket at all. When mathematicians saw conductor they went to the toilet, and when they heard knocking they handed in the ticket. They did not get it back. Why? The economists took it and went to the other toilet.

A party of mathematicians was climbing in the Alps . After several hours they became hopelessly lost. One of them studied the map for some time, turning it up and down, sighting on distant landmarks, consulting his compass, and finally the sun.

The mathematician's child and the economist's child were in the third grade together, and the teacher asked, "If one man with one shovel can dig a ditch in ten days, how long would it take ten men with ten shovels to dig the same ditch?" Both children raised their hands.

A lecturer tells some students to learn the phone-book by heart.

The mathematicians are baffled: "By heart? You kidding?"
The physics-students ask: "Why?"
The engineers sigh: "Do we have to?"
The chemistry-students ask: "Till next Monday?"
The accounting-students (scribbling): "Till tomorrow?"
The laws-students answer: "We already have."

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are at a hotel one night sleeping after the first day of a conference.

A disgruntled hotel employee decides to get even with the management. He goes to a floor where there is nobody in the hallway. He drops a lit match into a trash can in the hallway. The engineer wakes up and smells smoke. He goes out into the hallway and sees a fire, so he fills his trash can from his room with water and douses the fire. He goes back to bed.

The disgruntled hotel employee found another trash can in the hallway and drops a lit match into it. Later, the physicist wakes up and smells smoke. He opens his door and sees a fire in the hallway. He walks down the hall to a fire-hose and after calculating the flame distance, water pressure, trajectory, etc. extinguishes the fire with the minimum amount of water and energy needed. He goes back to bed.

This hotel employee then drops some trash paper and a lit match into the same trash can in the hallway. Then the mathematician wakes up and smells smoke. He goes to the hallway, sees a fire and then the fire-hose. He thinks for a moment and then exclaims, "Ah, a solution exists!!" and then goes back to bed.

You can guess what happened after that.

Three men are in a hot-air balloon. Soon, they find themselves lost in a canyon somewhere. One of the three men says, "I've got an idea. We can call for help in this canyon and the echo will carry our voices far."

So he leans over the basket and yells out, "Hellllooooo! Where are we?" (They hear the echo several times).

Two minutes later they hear this echoing voice: "Hellllooooo! You're lost!!"

One of the men says, "That must be a mathematician." Puzzled, one of the other men asks, "Why do you say that?"

He replies: "For three reasons. (1) he took a long time to answer, (2) he was absolutely correct, and (3) his answer was absolutely useless."

Several students were asked the following problem:

Is it true that all odd integers are prime?

Well, the first student to try to do this says "hmmm... Well, 1 is prime, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime and by induction, we have that all the odd integers are prime."

The physics student then said, "I'm not sure of the validity of your proof, but I think I'll try to prove it by experiment." He continues, "Well, 1 is prime, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ... uh, 9 is an experimental error, 11 is prime, 13 is prime... Well, it seems that that all odd integers are prime."

The third student to try it was the engineering student, who responded, "Well, actually, I'm not sure of your answer either. Let's see... 1 is prime, 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is ..., 9 is ..., standard deviation, 11 is prime, 13 is prime... Well, it does seem that all odd integers are prime."

Not to be outdone, the computer science student comes along and says "Well, you guys sort'v got the right idea, but you'd end up taking too long doing it. I've just whipped up a program using a "do loop" to REALLY go and prove it..." He runs his computer program. The computer responds, "1 is prime, 1 is prime, 1 is prime, 1 is prime, 1 is prime...."

An assemblage of the most gifted minds in the world were all posed the following question: "What is 2 times 2 ?"

Philosopher: "But what do you mean by 2 times 2 ?"

The engineer whips out his slide rule (so it's old) and shuffles it back and forth, and finally announces "3.99".

The physicist consults his technical references, sets up the problem on his computer, and announces "it lies between 3.99 and 4.01".

The doctor cogitates for a while, oblivious to the rest of the world, then announces: "I don't know what the answer is, but I can tell you, an answer exists!".

Politician: Closes all the doors and windows, looks around carefully, then whispers "What do you want it to be?"

Two male mathematicians are in a restaurant.

The first one says to the second that the average person knows very little about basic mathematics.
The second one disagrees, and claims that most people can cope with a reasonable knowledge of math.

The first mathematician goes off to the washroom, and in his absence the second calls over the waitress and tells her that after a few minutes when his friend returns, he will call her over and ask her a question. All she has to do is answer one third x cubed.

She repeats 'one thir -- dex cue'? He repeats 'one third x cubed'.
She: 'one thir dex cuebd'? Yes, that's right, he says. So she agrees, and goes off mumbling to herself, 'one thir dex cuebd...'.

The first guy returns and the second proposes a bet to prove his point, that most people do know something about basic math. He says he will ask the blonde waitress an integral calculus question, and the first laughingly agrees.

The second man calls over the waitress and asks "what is the integral of x squared?" The waitress says 'one third x cubed' and while walking away, turns back and says over her shoulder 'plus a constant'!

Question: "How many seconds are there in a year?" Answer: "Twelve, January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, ..."

Look what happens when an American President gets elected in a year with a "0"at the end.
1840: William Henry Harrison (Wing) (died in office)
1860: Abraham Lincoln (Republican) (assassinated)
1880: James A. Garfield (Republican) (assassinated)
1900: William McKinley (Republican) (assassinated)
1920: Warren G. Harding (Republican) (died in office)
1940: Franklin D. Roosevelt (Democrat) (died in office)
1960: John F. Kennedy (Democrat) (assassinated)
1980: Ronald Reagan (Republican)(survived assassination attempt)
2000: George W. Bush (Republican) murdered thousands of innocent people in Afghan & Iraqi wars

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.
Now it gets really weird.
Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.
John Wilkes Booth assassinated Lincoln; was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald assassinated Kennedy; was born in 1939.
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Hang on to your seat.
Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln' made by 'Ford.'
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the kicker.......
A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

Creepy huh?

Shatranj Story of Dil-Araam

White to play wins; Also black to play wins.
Show Answer

Optical Illusions:

How many hearts do you see?

If less than 12, try harder.
How many people do you see?
12 or 13?

Are these horizintal lines parallel or do they slope?

Man Playing Horn... Or Woman Sillhouette?

Hint: woman's right eye is the black speck in front of horn handle


What do you see?
Old Woman...
Or Young Girl?

Hint: the old woman's nose is the young girl's nose and chin


What do you see?
Skull or Woman at Vanity?

Hint: move farther from the screen to see the skull or move closer to see woman looking at the mirror


A Face of A Native American Or An Eskimo?

Hint: Neck of native American is feet of an Eskimo

Man, woman or a girl

Man, woman or a girl?

I think you can see all three


Soldier with Helmet or Bent Down Person?

Can you see 9 faces? What else do you see?
Spirals or Circle?
Which way the wheel is turning?
Turning wheel
Look at the center dot and move your face forward and backwards to and from screen. You will see a circle in motion
Circle in motion
What do you read?
What you read is what is in your mind.
Which gray rectangle is darker?

Actually, both gray rectangles are the same color.
Stairs going up or down?
If you look at top, stairs go down.
If you look at bottom, stairs go up.

Albert Einstein or
Marilyn Monroe?

When you look at this picture close range you see Albert Einstein.

Now stand up and take several steps back, roughly 6 feet away,
It will become... Marilyn Monroe.

Can you see 10 faces in the tree?
10 faces

What do you read, You or Me? me-you

What do you see?
A face or the word "liar"?
face or the word liar

"Teach" has a reflection "Learn"teach-learn
Can you see the Invisible Man?

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Intersting Number 2519:
For N=2 to 10:
2519/N always gives you remainder as (N-1)
2519 / 2 gives you remainder 1
2519 / 3 gives you remainder 2
2519 / 4 gives you remainder 3
2519 / 5 gives you remainder 4
2519 / 6 gives you remainder 5
2519 / 7 gives you remainder 6
2519 / 8 gives you remainder 7
2519 / 9 gives you remainder 8
2519 / 10 gives you remainder 9

Also For N=1 to 9:
(2519-N)/(N+1) always gives you a whole number
(2519 - 1 ) / 2 = 1259
(2519 - 2 ) / 3 = 839
(2519 - 3 ) / 4 = 629
(2519 - 4 ) / 5 = 503
(2519 - 5 ) / 6 = 419
(2519 - 6 ) / 7 = 359
(2519 - 7 ) / 8 = 314
(2519 - 8 ) / 9 = 279
(2519 - 9 ) / 10 = 251

Mathematical Anagrams:
a decimal pointI'm a dot in place
a number lineinnumerable
algebraa garble
calculationI call a count
decimal pointI'm a pencil dot
election results lies let's recount
eleven plus twotwelve plus one
factorizecraze of it
higher mathematicsahh! arithmetic gems
incomprehensibleproblem in Chinese
integral calculuscalculating rules
inconsistentn is, n is not, etc.
mathematicsmatch items
multiplicationmillion up attic
negationget a "no" in
number theorythey burn more
numerator true moran
pocket calculatorsclack! total up score
Year Two Thousand a year to shut down

Miscellaneous Anagrams:
action man cannot aim
animosity is no amity
astronomer moon starer
astronomers no more stars
comfort is Microsoft
debit card bad credit
don't questiondo inquest not
dormitorydirty room
election results lies - let's recount
mother-in-law woman Hitler
school masterthe classroom
slot machines cash lost in'em
tired nerves tense driver
the answerwasn't here
the country side no city dust here
the earthquakes that queer shake
the eyes they see
the morse codehere come dots
truth is it hurts

Geography Anagrams:Countries Anagrams:
California Africa lion Angola Analog
California African oil Burma Rumba
Houston hot on us Laos Also
Kansas City Satanic sky Isreal Serial
Tasmania I am Satan Peru Pure
Washington hating snow Spain Pains

Celebrity Anagrams:
Albert Einstein Ten Elite Brains
Bill Gates gets a bill
Clint Eastwood old west action
George Bush he bugs Gore
George W. Bush where bugs go
Jennifer Aniston fine in torn jeans
Princess Diana end is a car spin
Ronald Wilson Reagan insane anglo warlord
Sean Connery on any screen

Palindrome Sentences: (A to Z)
A nut for a jar of tuna.
Bob: "Did Anna peep?" Anna: "Did Bob?"
Cigar? Toss it in a can. It is so tragic.
Draw pupil's lip upward.
Enid and Edna dine.
Flee to me, remote elf.
Gateman sees name, garageman sees name tag.
Go hang a salami; I'm a lasagna hog.
He lived as a devil, eh?
If I had a hi-fi.
Live was I ere I saw Evil.
Madam, I'm Adam.
Name now one man.
Oh who was it I saw, oh who?
Pull up if I pull up.
Rats live on no evil star.
Some men interpret nine memos.
Ten animals I slam in a net.
Unglad, I tar a tidal gnu.
Was it a car or a cat I saw?
Yes, Mark, cable to hotel, "Back Ramsey."
Zeus was deified, saw Suez.

Do you know that:

'STEWARDESSES' is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

'LOLLIPOP' is the longest word typed with only right hand.

No word in the English language rhymes with 'MONTH', 'ORANGE', 'SILVER', or 'PURPLE'.

'DREAMT' is the only English word that ends in the letters 'mt'.

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: 'ABSTEMIOUS' and 'FACETIOUS'.

'TYPEWRITER' is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

Submitted by Ronald C. Emrit (September 2009).

'QUEUEING' is the only eight letter word with five vowels in a row.

'TREMENDOUS', 'HORRENDOUS', 'STUPENDOUS', and 'HAZARDOUS' are only four words ending in '-DOUS'.

Submitted by Khalid Shaukat (December 2013).


Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without
wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
finishes given assignments on time. Often Bob takes extended
measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
classed as a high-caliber employee, the type which cannot be
dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be
promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
sent away as soon as possible.

Project Leader

ABOVE NOTE (shown on the right):
  That stupid idiot was reading over my shoulder when I wrote the last note to you earlier today. Kindly read only the ODD BOLD lines skipping EVEN GRAY lines for my true assessment of him.

Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without
wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
finishes given assignments on time. Often Bob takes extended
measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
classed as a high-caliber employee, the type which cannot be
dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be
promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
sent away as soon as possible.

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